This is the #metoo era. About time! And unfortunately, it may be the #metoo era for a little while. Because there is so much crap to flush out of the system. Crap that has been there for so long that people convinced the rest of us that it is a diamond in the rough. But like I like to say: “if it looks like pooh and smells like pooh, it is 99.9% pooh”. There is so much to learn about how to come out with hard truth, follow through and make a sustainable change for the community. But that will be the topic for another blog post. Right now, I want to focus on women situations.
What better way than putting myself in their shoes. At least trying. Because does not matter all my good intentions I will never feel how most women feel. My obligation though is to actively listen to their concern and be at least supportive and of course at best a change agent.
A colleague of mine has been helping, probably without meaning to. But who cares. The important is the result. It first started a day I met my colleague after she had worked out. She looked very happy and full of energy that morning. So I said: “working out first thing in the morning suits you well. You have a glee today”. It turned out that she wore make up that morning. Which may or may not be the reason I noticed that glee. She cheekily answered, “You can not reduce women to the make up she wears”. I know she was joking, still, she was making a good point. I am a big fan of Alicia Keys not wearing makeup. Great signal to women in general. And I love what it will convey to my daughter when she is older. “It is ok to not wear makeup if you do not want to. Your body, your rules”. So how come I made that comment to my colleague? My best guess is unconscious bias. Not an excuse. More an insight for me to do better.
There is also a second incident where she said, she wanted to make me feel for a few minutes how it feels to be a woman. But I will keep that story for next week.
The Black Negotiator 